I have been noticing this Winter has been different to me compared to other Winters before. This Winter I half consciously and half subconsciously decided to focus on deep cleansing, growing roots, releasing, grounding; earthing, self reflecting, hibernating and on transformations.
I have been opening my eyes more to the beauty surrounding me, to the medicine surrounding me, to the wisdom surrounding me, to the possible healing surrounding me. I truly settled into Winter, embraced her. Strongly felt this season, as a cyclical being, also lives within me. It is part of me, the darkness. Previous Winters I would yearn and long for Spring to come but this Winter it wasn’t even om my mind. There was so much to open my eyes to, to learn from, to welcome, to feel and to move through, to sit with.
All these facets of Winter have been inviting me and so willingly have I been opening my heart and eyes to them. This Winter was one of deep transformation. One where I started coming home to myself. Be alone by myself in the dark, at times at night, other times the darkness inside myself, diving down deep into the darkness of my womb. Sitting with myself, by myself. Redefining my internal space; expanding her. Answering my needs.
I have been diving down deep, into deep cleansing and my inner roots, ever since moving back to my hometown. The time I lived with my parents brought so much medicine and healing, those five months were very necessary. In December, I listened to a strong call, instead of moving in with Tom, to live by myself right now… (stretching onwards… who knows… I will just feel and follow my intuition.) This time of being by myself, especially during Winter has been feeling so natural. I am moving with the Cycle. I have been and am descending into my Roots and have been offering myself deep cleansing. Listening to desires, wounds, whispers, cries, needs, joys. Finding my home in my core sense of being, in my Roots. I have been connecting to places real deeply like the Weeping Willow Tree close to my parents’ place and national park the Veluwe; especially the part close to Dieren. It brings me much joy and connection to visit them in meditation and to physically walk and move my body by and through these places. I sit down, take my time, center myself and feel myself coming home again and again to myself.
From Winter (death) to Spring (rebirth); I am moving with a New Cycle.